Sunday, 28 February 2016

The scourge of violence with mental illness

I wrote a few days ago about the problems my ex-wife and I are having with our daughter Adelaide, and how Adelaide would go to my ex-wife's purse to take money when she ran out of her allowance. I have been sending money to Adelaide through my ex-wife for about 18 months in order to just do something, just to help with a situation that can otherwise get out of control. I have tried to be supportive in this way but I think that things are now moving out of my control.

Yesterday I received an email from my ex-wife telling me that Adelaide had verbally assaulted her and forced her to give her - Adelaide - money for alcohol. My ex-wife then asked me to send Adelaide's allowance directly to Adelaide in future because she didn't want anything to do with the money any more.

But I think that I will not be sending any more money. I emailed my ex-wife telling her that it was time to get the police involved. The police have come to the house on occasion in the past when Adelaide has become unruly and someone has called them. This time, however, noone called them and so Adelaide has got her way. But it is time now to talk with the doctors, I think, and get them to organise independent accommodation for Adelaide. It is clear to me that she cannot live any more with her mother because she is liable to become violent.

Furthermore, I am disinclined to continue supplying an allowance - as well as travel expenses and treatment costs - to Adelaide. If she is going to use violence then she has to be given a message that violence is not acceptable. I hope that my ex-wife can work through these problems with the doctors and find some suitable accommodation for my daughter. This seems to me to be the only way forward. It is time for Adelaide to live independently, and to see if that is going to work for her.

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