All semester two assignments are now complete, the last to be submitted tomorrow.

And in the news we have Salman Rushdie getting the tap from HRH Liz! This is (surprise!) condemned by an Iranian foreign ministry spokesman as "a blatant example of the anti-Islamism of senior British officials".

Blah blah blah.

Along with Rushdie, our very own Barry Humphries will bend the knee, and receive a CBE. Dame Edna, his media manager, admitted by telephone in conversation with a TV reporter that she had urged HRH to "throw him a crumb". "Throw him anything," said Everage.

HRH would have remembered Dame Edna welcoming her to a concert with "The Jubilee girl is here, possums", a typical greeting from the gorgeous lady of Moonee Ponds.